My First Round Mock Compete With Proper Slave Names

Discussion in 'NFL Draft Discussion' started by Jihad Joe, Apr 25, 2011.

  1. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    Like most of you I was highly disappointed when K Train didnt do his "Proper name mock" this year, so I decided to it, but with a little twist thanks to Adrian Peterson and Rashard Mendenhall. Since playing pro Football is like slavery, Im going to give each Kunta a new slave name


    #1- Carolina: Toby Newton, QB Auburn-

    Throws a might purdy ball




    #2- Denver- Toby Dareus, DT Alabama

    Massir Elway seems like he's not sold on Toby Tebow, so Gabbert could be a surpise pick here




    #3- Buffalo- Toby Gabbert, QB Some craphole Big 12 School

    They lose out on Newton and get Gabbert who should still fit. Unfortunatly for them, while white people make better QB's, black people make better slaves




    #4-Cincinatti- Toby Green, WR UG

    Green hops on the Underground Railroad in Georgia and heads to the North




    #5- Arizona- Toby Miller, OLB TAMU

    Massir Whisenhut needs a QB, but he needs a pass rusher almost as bad




    #6- Cleveland- Toby Fairley, DT Auburn

    Going to a 4-3, the need a 3 Tech




    #7- San Fransisco- Toby Petterson, CB LSU

    Odd that all of the top 7 picks play in the south?




    #8 Tennessee- Toby Jones, WR Alabama




    #9 Dallas- Toby Smith OT, USC

    Dallas tapping the west coast to fill the plantation,




    10- Washington- Toby Locker, QB Washington

    A good fit for Massir Shannahan, unfortunatly Lock is a couple years away from being able to work in the house




    11-Houston- Toby Watt, DE Indiana?????? Wisconsin????/

    Hard working Ginger Kid will make a great mascot




    12- Minnesota- Toby Quinn, DE North Carolina

    Brain tumor and missing the year has him dropping, but a top field worker




    13- Detroit - Toby Costanzo, OT Boston College



    14- St. Louis- Toby Amakamara, CB Nebraska




    15- Miami- Toby Ingram, HB Alabama

    The last of the Alabama Blackskins to go in the first




    16- Jacksonville- Toby Smith, DE Mizzo



    17- New England- Toby Kerrigan, DE Purdue


    Masser Billicheck demands hard working high motor players. Kerrigan is a poor mans JJ Watt in that he has the makings of a great mascot expect he isnt really talented like Watt. Will be hung from a tree in 3 year




    18- San Diego, Toby Jordan, DE Cal



    19- New York Giants- Toby Pouncey, OL Florida



    20- Tampa Bay- Toby Bowers, DE Clemson

    Great talent, but a serious knee injury means there is a strong possibility of him being hung from a tree




    21- Kansas City- Toby Taylor, NT Baylor

    Slips this far because at 350 Lbs, will be the hardest player in the draft to string up and whip




    22- Indianapolis- Toby Carimi

    Toby Manning is getting older every year (duh), and Massir Caldwell's OL isnt as stong as it was in Mannings younger years




    23- Philadelphia- Toby Smith, CB Colorado




    24- New Orleans- Toby Claiborne, DE Iowa




    25-Seattle Seahawks- Toby Mallet QB Arkansas

    String him up and whip him a few times and he could be the QB in this class




    26- Baltimore- Toby Ayers, LB UCLA

    Not a great worker but a versatile . Can work in the house or in the field You need that for a hybrid D





    27- Atlanta, Toby Watkins OG Baylor

    I think he may be Mormon, which means he is a goober. Is 27 years old, but Atlanta may be losing Toby Blaylock to FA




    28- New England- Toby Reed, LB Arizona

    Like Ayers can work in the house or in the field





    29- Chicago- Toby Solder, LT Colorado




    30- New York Jets- Toby Williams, CB/FS Texas]

    Masser Ryan needs a FS bad and Williams grades out as the best in this draft




    31- Pittsburgh- Toby Harris, CB Miami

    Harris may be a better pure CB then Williams




    32- Green Bay- Toby Heyward, DE OSU

    Toby Jenkins is a FA and may not be back
     
  2. Litez0ut

    Litez0ut Litez0ut Sucka

    Good stuff but I can't see Hou, or Det passing on Prince.
     
  3. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    Its hard to say, he could easily land either place. Houstion however is going to a 3-4 and dont have alot of fits for it up front. Detroit really needs a LT
     
  4. Litez0ut

    Litez0ut Litez0ut Sucka

    Agreed on both. But Det will neglect the tackle position again like they do all the time haha jk. You think Chi goes for another crappy tackle?
     
  5. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    Yes but they'll think they are getting a stud. Sherrod makes more since now, but Solder could be an excellent LT down the line

    He reminds a lot of Staley, and that hasnt worked out so great
     
  6. Litez0ut

    Litez0ut Litez0ut Sucka

    Hell yeah it hasn't I hated that pick. a LT that gives up atleast 8 sacks a year and is injured the other half of the year.
     
  7. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    Thats what you get when you pick a TE to play LT
     
  8. K Train

    K Train Do You Honeycutt?

    lol the proper name draft is comin for the contest...

    harris is a baller, but hes not a good fit for the steelers
     
  9. K Train

    K Train Do You Honeycutt?

    i would say castonzo is more like staley

    i think solder is alot like vollmer only alot more terrible
     
  10. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    I think Castanzo is a bit more sound of a prospect then Staley was albiet let physically skilled
     
  11. Walnuts

    Walnuts All-Pro

    I don't think Toby is a good pick at that point.

    Question, what would Toby Gerharts name have been in this draft?
     
  12. mike oxlong

    mike oxlong The Voice Of Reason


    Kunte Gerhart
     
  13. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    Tobie Gerhart
     
  14. Jihad Joe

    Jihad Joe Life to Infidels

    I forgot Toby Luiget

    Eh, heck him. he has a stupid name anyways