The Good, The Bad And The Ugly; Week 7 NFL

Discussion in 'NFL Writer's Block' started by steeljake75, Oct 22, 2013.

  1. steeljake75

    steeljake75 Rookie


    Week 7 is over, well it will be after we have our say!!! New Contender/Pretender rankings are coming out today but let's get it rolling with a these four things I know are true:

    - If looks could kill 2 running back and a kick returner would not be breathing in Denver right now

    - You can take Josh Freeman out of Tamp but you can't take the Bucs out of Josh Freeman

    - Even The Golden Boy can't trump being snitched on by the opposing team to the officials

    - So since 72 players went out with season ending injuries this week are we still focusing on 'player safety'?

    Bumps and bruises turn into torn this and that week, also Petyon and Eli trade places for a change. We also have bad teams getting worse, good teams getting complacent and of course the Ugly is in full swing by this time of year. Also, this is for Mr. Irsay; No one knows who slashed your tires and crapped on your windshield in what looks like the shape of the number 18. The Indianapolis police consider this case closed.

    And for the meat!!!

    The Good

    - Seattle Seahawks

    The just keep cruising along and I don't see a lot that can slow them down. We all have our doubts about that midget playing QB, but he just keep winning so we just keep quiet. Soar on my avian friends.

    - Atlanta Falcons

    Well, you played the Bucs so you were expected to win and for that I would normally put you in the bad. However, with all the injuries you have you get to be in the Good... for now. See ya further down real soon.

    - Carolina Panthers

    Yup, you beat up on bad teams, nice going bully boy. Cam Newton is VY's cousin and his melt down is coming, I promise.

    - Cincinnati Bengals

    I keep waiting for the Bungles to come back and I am sure they will, but not this week. Close wins are still wins so keep 'em coming if you can.

    - Buffalo Bills

    So who is the quarter back now? The grounds keeper maybe? Who knows, and as long as you get the W who cares right? Close win against a division rival is a great way to get a win any way you cut it as well.

    - Washington Redskins

    So if the Redskins got into a shoot out with the Bears and then won does that qualify as animal cruelty? or since they're Indians does that make it ok? I am confused on where this is going so i am just gonna move on...

    - San Francisco 49ers

    Frank Gore is now rolling and look at what is happening?!?! I am winning in FF and you get W's. See?!?! Just run Gore and EVERYONE IS HAPPY!!!!

    - Kansas City Chiefs

    Big friggin' deal. You won again... Am I the only one who sees how soft this schedule is?!?! Dear Chiefs, you have beat one team with a winning record and that was Dallas, who won;t have a winning record very long. Call me when you beat someone. NEXT!

    - Pittsburgh Steelers

    Who knew??! A running game emerges and the Steelers get 2 in a row. Too bad Oakland is to Pittsburgh as Kryptonite is to Superman. It was a nice turn around while it lasted.

    - Indianapolis Colts

    A not was posted in the Broncos locker room after the game addressed to Holliday, Hillman and Moreno:

    Thanks for the help guys, couldn't have done it without you. No way we were good enough to get that win on our. Check is in the mail.

    - New York Football Giants

    Hey look at that... you guys played a team worse than you and got a win. About friggin time, now rip off 9 in a row and make Dallas go home early in January so the world can right itself. No more jokes about Eli being fathered by the milkman though, I watched the book of Manning this week and his family can't deny him even when they want to.

    Now for our weekly musical interlude:

    [ame=""]Megadeth ☢ Tornado of Souls Live - YouTube[/ame]

    Back to the show we go, time get a little mean...

    The Bad

    - New York Jets

    You beat Tom Terrific you say? So what I say. Snitches get stitches and you guys need about 300 of them right now.

    - New England Patriots

    You should have never get to the point that is was that close guys... COME ON MAN!!!

    - Detroit Lions

    You had it in your reach and just could not close it out. Time to take that next step in team maturity and learn to finish games.

    - San Diego Chargers

    You beat Jacksonville... big whoop.

    - Chicago Bears

    Neckbeard wants to say hi there fellas. I guess Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall aren't so glad to see Shanny now are they?

    - Tennessee Titans

    You rushed Jake Locker back for what? Getting a beat down from the Bay City Rollers isn't exactly the triumphant return you were looking for... right? Here's a clue... run the ball!!!!

    - Dallas Cowboys

    I don't care if you won a division game, I hate you.

    - Philadelphia Eagles

    If I didn't have so many teams in the Ugly already you guys would have gone there too. Nick Foles did you guys just as much good after his head started ringing and sat on the bench as he did in the game. Chip Kelly is two steps away from being a joke at this point and the only thing his up tempo offense is doing is making them lose faster. I wonder if they miss the 'stache yet...

    It is now time for this weeks Contender/Pretender. In case you forgot, the higher your rank in Prentender (as in lower number) the worse off you are. Let's get it rolling!!!

    Losers go first so...


    1. Green Bay Packers

    Beating up on bad teams is good for the win column but bad for the confidence to go far. With Detroit in this list as well and the Bears QB down you might win the division, then again...

    2. Detroit Lions

    Hey speak of the devil. I think the Lions can get it rolling but until they learn to win close games they won't get far at all. I concede that anything is better than how it used to be though.

    3. San Francisco 49ers

    They have their running game rolling but I am still not ready to move them over to the C side. Questions about Kap still remain and then there is the curse of the Super Bowl loser, if you buy into that of course.

    4. Dallas Cowboys

    Yup, you know I ain't buyin nothin these chumps are selling. Now Dez Bryant thinks he is elite, only him and Jerry are on that band wagon. Romo is still the king of choking, and he is due. Besides Mike Greenberg just jumped on this band wagon. #kissofdeath

    5. Kansas City Chiefs

    7 wins and one is against a team above .500 and that is Dallas who had to win to get there this week. Until we see Alex Smith have to do some work and not rely on his D and Jamal Charles they stay right here.


    5. New England Patriots

    A slip by Tommy and Bill this week but still in the mix. I am not a betting man per se but I wouldn't put any money on the Pats getting that penalty ever again. The successful return of The Gronk also helps their case.

    4. Cincinnati Bengals

    I cannot believe I have to put this team anywhere positive, but they have earned it. Close wins against good teams always help boost confidence. The division games are coming though...

    3. Denver Broncos

    Despite the complete failure of the running back corps and what looks like a tired defense I still think they can go far. The do have Peyton manning. You know him right? 6'3; about 225 with a rocket, laser arm...

    2. Indianapolis Colts

    Yes, I gave the credit for their win against the Broncos to the failure of said team, but they have beat some good teams on there way to what might be a walk in the park for the AFC South title. Reggie Wayne's injury notwithstanding of course.

    1. Seattle Seahawks

    At home, on the road, close games or blows out. It doesn't matter, they win them all. This ride is definitely going to January and maybe even further. They keep this spot until they find a way to lose it.

    Now it is time to say the things the players wish they could and broadcasters that get fired do. No more nice, no more kid gloves, just plain mean, nasty...


    - Green Bay Packers Uniforms

    You there is a reason you don't wear those anymore right? Vince is rolling over in his grave looking at that... COME ON MAN!!

    - Arizona Cardinals

    Well you didn't blanked this time, but you still suck and you still lost. Have a nice day.

    - Jacksonville Jaguars

    This team is so bad even Tebow praying for them is a lost cause. Look at that though, you scroed 2 field goals... woo hoo!!!


    - Denver Broncos Hillman, Holliday and Moreno

    The official law firm of Adam Jones and the reason why Peyton Manning lost in the house he built. I hope you had to get dressed in the hallway then take a Greyhound back to Mile High.

    - Miami Dolphins

    What in the name of Csonka is going on in South Beach?!?! You guys staying out with king James and his crew too much or what? Get it together people!!!

    - Cleveland Browns

    The only people that did not expect you gusy to suck again were those who are not fans of yours. They knew you couldn't handle winning... they just knew. Welcome back home to the Uggo's where you belong.

    - Houston Texans

    Super Bowl contenders huh? Senior Kubiac was the only one spreading that rumor. I bet the new rumor is that his house is for sale.

    - Baltimore Ravens

    All that money for Joe Slack-o and what do you get? Lack of leadership and a losing record that's what. Ray Rice is done, the o-line makes Pittsburgh's look like the Hogs from the 80's Redskins and oh yeah... You traded Anquan Boldin for a box of used helmets. Nice.

    - Minnesota Vikings

    Josh Freeman? Really?!?!?! You what to say... say it to yourself... do it right meow!!!

    That is all we have for this week people, tune in next week when we'll hear Andy Reid say; 'Mike who?' Send all hate mail, love letters and death threats to and find us on Facebook (The GBU) and twitter @GBUCentral and as always remember this is just my opinion and $699.99 will get you a
    Fender Custom Telecaster FMT HH - Black Cherry.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 27, 2013

    ICECOLD 1st Stringer

    Really looking forward to the niners being considered "contenders" again. Guess I'll have to wait until after the bye
  3. CaptainStubing

    CaptainStubing Gave her a Dirty Sanchez

    Good stuff. Entertaining asi usual
  4. DaBearsrule4ever

    DaBearsrule4ever Hall Of Famer

    While Josh Freeman was the Josh Freeman I expected on Monday night, if he can't have a good game passing wise against the Packers (who are ranked 23rd against the pass), the Vikings should give up on Freeman.
  5. 86WARD

    86WARD -

    Excellent @steeljake. Every week, you're pretty much on point with our Steelers. Can't say I disagreed with you yet...
  6. ragman

    ragman Pro Bowler Fantasy Guru

    I disagree with your assessment of the Cowboys. They nearly shut out an offense that's supposed to be really good.
  7. steeljake75

    steeljake75 Rookie

    They are supposed to be, but they aren't. And the Cowgirls didn't shut them out did they? Have a nice day.
  8. Diesel44

    Diesel44 Serial Killer

    I thought the ugliest thing of the week was that turd of a monday game in the meadowlands.